Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Ford Prefect explaining to Arthur Dent about why a robot said "take me to your lizards".
"It comes from a very ancient democracy, you see..."
"You mean, it comes from a world of lizards?"
"No," said Ford, who by this time was a little more rational and coherent than he had been, having finally had the coffee forced down him, "nothing so simple. Nothing anything like to straightforward. On its world, the people are people. The leaders are lizards. The people hate the lizards and the lizards rule the people."
"Odd," said Arthur, "I thought you said it was a democracy."
"I did," said ford. "It is."
"So," said Arthur, hoping he wasn't sounding ridiculously obtuse, "why don't the people get rid of the lizards?"
"It honestly doesn't occur to them," said Ford. "They've all got the vote, so they all pretty much assume that the government they've voted in more or less approximates to the government they want."
"You mean they actually vote for the lizards?"
"Oh yes," said Ford with a shrug, "of course."
"But," said Arthur, going for the big one again, "why?"
"Because if they didn't vote for a lizard," said Ford, "the wrong lizard might get in. Got any gin?"
"I said," said Ford, with an increasing air of urgency creeping into his voice, "have you got any gin?"
"I'll look. Tell me about the lizards."
Ford shrugged again.
"Some people say that the lizards are the best thing that ever happened to them," he said. "They're completely wrong of course, completely and utterly wrong, but someone's got to say it."
[link] [1322 comments]
Man, Communism and Chocolate? Sounds like a worker's paradise.
Monday, November 28, 2011
Sunday, November 27, 2011
Tattoo artist, Ryan L. Fitzjerald was hit with a $100,000 lawsuit last week by his ex-girlfriend Rossie Brovent. She claims that her boyfriend was supposed to tattoo a scene from Narnia on her back but instead tattooed an image of a pile of excrement with flies buzzing around it.
Apparently Ryan found out that she had cheated with a long-time friend of his and this was his way of getting even. Originally Rossie tried to have Ryan charged with assault but it turns out this crafty tattoo artist got her to sign a consent form prior to the tattoo and it said that the design was 'at the artists discretion', she claims; "he tricked her by drinking a bottle of cheap wine with me and doing tequila shots before I signed it and got the tattoo". "Actually I was passed out for most of the time, and woke up to this horrible image on my back."
Saturday, November 26, 2011
Huarmey, Peru mayor Jose Benitez is reportedly concerned that high levels of strontium in his town's drinking water are turning men gay. From LGBT Asylum News (unrelated photo from Travel Blog):
“Unfortunately Strontium reduces male hormones and suddenly we’ll be as Tabalosos, as other towns, where the percentages are increasing of homosexuality," (Benitez said.)
Tabalosos is located in the department of San Martin, in the interior of Peru – where the water comes from. Some years ago a Peruvian television program said that its population was predominantly homosexual, an image according to Tabalosos’ mayor, Jorge Luis Vasquez, ‘which is costing us’.
…Dr. Robert Castro Rodriguez, dean of the College of Pharmaceutical Chemistry of Lima, told Peruvian radio that large amounts of Strontium in the body cause bone cancer, anemia and cardiovascular complications – but not homosexuality.
"Beware! Strontium in Water Causes Homosexuality!" (via Fortean Times)
Friday, November 25, 2011
It's simple. You just go to any blog and tag it "terrorism". It could be a widget.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Talk about stirring up controversy. A new study shows that the urine of people who consume canned soup can contain surprisingly high levels of bisphenol A (BPA), a hormone-disrupting compound linked to health problems including heart disease, diabetes, and obesity.
People who consumed one serving of canned soup a day for five days had a more than 1,000 percent increase in urinary BPA over people who consumed fresh soup for five days, the study showed.
“We’ve known for a while that drinking beverages that have been stored in certain hard plastics can increase the amount of BPA in your body,” study author Jenny Carwile, a doctoral student at Harvard School of Public Health, said in a written statement. “This study suggests that canned foods may be an even greater concern, especially given their wide use.”
BPA is used in the linings of metal food and beverage cans as well as in certain plastic bottles and dental sealants…
[continues at CBS News]
Wednesday, November 23, 2011
This clip from the BBC's Frozen Planet is one of the most amazing things you will ever see.
"Brinicle" is a clever portmanteau for an icy finger of death that forms naturally in the very cold seawater one finds around Earth's poles. A crust of sea ice can form on top of this water, and that's the first step to making a brinicle. Here's how polar oceanographer Mark Brandon explained the process in an article on the BBC website:
In winter, the air temperature above the sea ice can be below -20C, whereas the sea water is only about -1.9C. Heat flows from the warmer sea up to the very cold air, forming new ice from the bottom. The salt in this newly formed ice is concentrated and pushed into the brine channels. And because it is very cold and salty, it is denser than the water beneath.
The result is the brine sinks in a descending plume. But as this extremely cold brine leaves the sea ice, it freezes the relatively fresh seawater it comes in contact with. This forms a fragile tube of ice around the descending plume, which grows into what has been called a brinicle.
Check out that BBC website link for more information on how the Frozen Planet videographers captured this footage. That's also where you should go to watch the video when this YouTube version is inevitably taken down.
Thank you, Brittany. Truly freaking amazing.
Male nursery web spiders often woo potential lady-friends with gifts wrapped in silk. Mating may ensue, during which a female unspools the present, expecting to find a tasty treat. But the males can be unscrupulous. Some offerings contain inedible plant seeds or empty insect exoskeletons.
…The empty-handed males were mostly unsuccessful at mating. Whereas those with a gift could get the girl. But if the gift was worthless, the females quickly realized the deceit and pushed the copulating males off.
The Scientific American blog post (based on this paper) makes it sound as if the males are the only ones using deception and dirty tricks. But why do the males silk wrap their gifts? Why not just present the females with food?
Females presented with food will often grab the food and run, leaving the males doubly hungry. A wrapped package is harder to steal (the males have a better grip on the silk) and as the females slowly unwrap their potentially delicious presents the males copulate. Thus, the rituals of silken wrapped gifts conceal intricate conflicts over resources and sex. Only among spiders, of course.
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
It was a long, long time ago in 1979. The elders tell us how the Green People showed up outside the Inupiat Native village of Kaktovik in their black powerboat and set out their stores of vegetables on the beach. The Green People only ate green food. The Green People then set off in their black powerboat on their blubber-saving mission, with a plan to block the Eskimo's bidarka whaling ship. Quick as a Raven's wink, they got lost in a fog bank and stuck in the ice sheet. Prepared, committed, and resourceful, the Green People set out their pup tents on the ice floe and slept, hoping for the fog to lift in the morning.
Monday, November 21, 2011
A Florida woman called Oneal Ron Morris has been arrested for performing dangerous cosmetic surgeries of her own devising, injecting his "patient" with a cocktail of tire-sealant, cement, and glue to "enhance" her bum. The victim has developed an MRSA infection and pneumonia.
Pictured here, Ms Morris.
“They agreed on the price of $700 for the procedure, which was intended for cosmetic purposes,” Bamford said.
What the woman got for her money was a series of injections containing a bizarre concoction of cement, super glue, mineral oil and Fix-A-Flat tire inflator and sealant, police said.
Bamford said that the procedure was conducted not in a clinic, but in a residential setting in Miami Gardens, and that shortly after the substance was injected into the woman’s body she developed what Bamford termed “severe complications.”
Sunday, November 20, 2011
“You have a lot of kids graduating college who can’t find jobs,” he said. “That’s what happened in Cairo. That’s what happened in Madrid. You don’t want those kinds of riots here.”
Who’s the carbon steel investigation robot that’s programmed with 5,000 sexual techniques guaranteed to please all the chicks?
YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT.
Who is the driod that would risk his vital circuitry for his compatible counterparts?
CAN YOU DIG IT?
Who’s the cybernetic feline that won’t malfunction when there’s danger all about?
You see this cat Mechanical Shaft is a bad mother—
I’M ONLY TALKING BOUT SHAFT.
He’s got a complicated 128 bit encrypted operating system but no one understands him but his female cybernetic translation matrix.